"I just wanted to know what would happen"
What I was unaware of was that this would happen, over and over again, it would manifest itself inside me, and grow, pushing me out of myself. It would take over my heart, and change me. Like living in a world of fun house mirrors. I can sit infront of a mirror, and feel like two people. I can dissociate myself from my reflection. I do not know why I do this, why I crave this, why I need this, why I chase this down, for it to pull me in and suffocate me. Naive, stupid, foolish girl. Like a blanket, I pull it up, and cover myself in it, I feel its warmth, and its comfort, before it turns cold. It stops protecting me, and turns ice cold. I push that thought from my head, I paint it better than I know it is, I want this, I need this. The facade along with it's numbing voice, I knew it would be back. I look at my hands, I look into my eyes staring back at me, and deep into my soul; Where have I gone?
What I was unaware of was that this would happen, over and over again, it would manifest itself inside me, and grow, pushing me out of myself. It would take over my heart, and change me. Like living in a world of fun house mirrors. I can sit infront of a mirror, and feel like two people. I can dissociate myself from my reflection. I do not know why I do this, why I crave this, why I need this, why I chase this down, for it to pull me in and suffocate me. Naive, stupid, foolish girl. Like a blanket, I pull it up, and cover myself in it, I feel its warmth, and its comfort, before it turns cold. It stops protecting me, and turns ice cold. I push that thought from my head, I paint it better than I know it is, I want this, I need this. The facade along with it's numbing voice, I knew it would be back. I look at my hands, I look into my eyes staring back at me, and deep into my soul; Where have I gone?
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